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Why do some people love an argument

Some people relish a good argument, what is a good argument?  There is no such thing as a good argument.

  • Is it the argument you have won because?
  • The person submits into silence?
  • You have the last say?
  • You might think you have won or have you?

Some people find arguing exciting.  Some people look for an argument at every opportunity.  It is a shame they do not get the same buzz from having a meaning full relationship.

Has the person got a point are they right, for example, they might say you are lazy, unmotivated, are they correct.

Someone has to take responsibility and stop arguing.

The anger might be brewing, the person you have been arguing with might still be conversing with in his or her own head the argument and anger is still brewing inside festering away.  Your relationship could be in jeopardy.  When you ask some people what the argument was about they cannot remember.

The person you are arguing with might be too young for you they might be a control freak. 

We all learn from our parents and how we have been brought up you might be of an argumentative nature because of what you have learnt, experienced.

None of us have been taught how we should conduct our relationships, they do not teach this sort of thing at school.  However they do teach us discipline and how to conduct ourselves with others, we sometimes forget this during an argument.  If you had only a short time left on this earth would you still argue?  There is the old saying we always hurt the one we love the one we should not hurt at all.

You might of got into an argument because you have not planned something like going on holiday one of you might be stressed about the planning.  One of you might think you do all the preparation.

Your partner might have someone else interjecting into the argument from behind the scenes.  You might have more that just two people in your relationship.  If this is the case how can you win you do not know what is being said, who said what.  It is like someone fuelling anger resentment behind the scenes, they light the touch paper because of their hatred or jealousy for you.  At the end of the day will they be there to pick up the pieces when it all goes wrong.

Perhaps your partner is not one of the patient types – Why is this are they stressed out about work.  Perhaps they have a problems they might not of told you about, you must sit down and chat about this.  Talk about their fears and how they feel.

How long have you known your partner, you might not be suitably matched, have you grown apart, should you start to do more together.  Is he or she the one for you?

If some one gets physical you really should walk away, they might say they would change however they never will.  If they are a liar you will never know if they are telling the truth.

It is always important to remain calm and rational without raising your voice.  The person you are arguing with thinks you are wrong in the in their head. 

When you both start talking you must listen and hear what you both are talking about.

Remember you can only move forward you cannot move back.  There is no point in arguing about the past is there.

Leave time for you both to calm down and then start to talk rationally.  Do not take things to heart too much.

It is always a good idea not to tell anyone and everyone else about your argument.  Keep it private amongst yourselves.

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